God is able to erase tour pain and give your your health back
I never had my health to begin with. I didn't acquire pain and disability through lack of faith or whatever it is you believe of me. I was born with systemic disease. I've been sick and in pain since early childhood. I grew up deeply religious and devoted every day to serving God and believing in his words. The result was manipulation, neglect, attempted trafficking, homelessness, victim-blaming, PTSD, and more abuse than I will ever be willing to speak of. My God-filled upbringing made my life far worse than it should have been, and has quite possibly ruined me. And yet, I carry on, and I still choose to believe he exists. I don't know why, but I still do.
I appreciate that you believe things can get better, but I won't be accused of bringing my pain on myself or inviting bad things to happen to me because I don't pray hard enough or I sin too much or I don't have enough faith. Those kind of ableist statements, among many others, were shoved down my throat and used to physically, sexually, mentally, and emotionally harm me for many years. There will never be enough medical treatment to cure me from the permanent effects of that trauma. Religious abuse is real. I wish it wasn't, but it very much is.
I'm not fussing at you or accusing you of anything. I'm only explaining that my illnesses have been a lifelong problem caused by genetics, and if God wanted to heal me when I was on my face before him on a daily basis for three decades, he could have. He chose not to, and I will not take a single thread of blame for that ever again as long as I live.
Thank you for your thoughts and prayers.
+1 answer
Read more
I appreciate that you believe things can get better, but I won't be accused of bringing my pain on myself or inviting bad things to happen to me because I don't pray hard enough or I sin too much or I don't have enough faith. Those kind of ableist statements, among many others, were shoved down my throat and used to physically, sexually, mentally, and emotionally harm me for many years. There will never be enough medical treatment to cure me from the permanent effects of that trauma. Religious abuse is real. I wish it wasn't, but it very much is.
I'm not fussing at you or accusing you of anything. I'm only explaining that my illnesses have been a lifelong problem caused by genetics, and if God wanted to heal me when I was on my face before him on a daily basis for three decades, he could have. He chose not to, and I will not take a single thread of blame for that ever again as long as I live.
Thank you for your thoughts and prayers.