@thejoshspeaks

The Josh Speaks

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How can you tell when your relationship is failing? What are some indicators?

A big indicator is a lack of communication. If you feel like you guys are talking less and less then try to tell your partner how you feel here and give suggestions for activities the two of you can do together to rekindle that spark.

Ok so there's this girl I really like, and I think she liked me BC we went to the dance together and danced, but I want to ask her out to be my girlfriend...but the past couple days she changed and doesn't really want to talk, the dance was like two months ago, did I wait to long to ask her out?

Hey it sounds like within the two months of not following up she might have lost interest in the idea of going out. What I would do is focus on getting to know her better and restart that interaction from the beginning by talking to her when you see her and eventually in to hanging out with her.

How to tell what a girl wants in her boyfriend? In terms of reading her signals

Hey, i made a video called 3 things girls want in a man which might be very helpful for you. Check it out!

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What to do when you're dealing with a bunch of drama and also it's distracting me from my school work

Drama can be really annoying. The best way to deal with it is to pull yourself out of it. If you hear rumors, dont spread them and dont engage in them. Dont confront people, dont attack people, just pull yourself out completely. What will start to happen is people will begin to get bored because youre not indulging and they'll stop involving you.

Hey josh I am 14 going on 15 in a month. . My Mom is so over protective. She reads my text messages and interrogates me about them and I have no privacy at all. . I ain't allowed social media. I am planning to have a chat to my mom about it but idk what to what to say. Please help. Thanx

Hey, to be fair as long as you are under her house, she has the right to monitor your phone. I know that its incredibly annoying but one thing you can do is ask for a little more privacy by having a lock on the phone but allowing her to take the phone away at night just to compromise. As time passes she may trust you more and become more relaxed with the rules, but that comes with trust and time.

Hey josh this is no joke. I am Christian, I am 14 and I am addicted to masturbating. I've managed to stop my porn addiction but I have photographic memory and masturbate to my memory. I've tried so many times to stop and it doesn't work. I want to stop cause I'm disappointing God🙁please help

Hey Christian, contrary to popular belief, masturbation is normal and healthy. There are no negative affects to your body when you do it, your body is producing those fluids every day so youre not going to go blind or use it up or anything like that.
It can however become addictive if you are constantly doing it to the point where it interferes with other things like spending time with others, schoolwork or other activities. What you could try doing is whenever you feel the urge to masturbate, try doing pushups till you cant anymore, what your body may be craving is an adrenaline rush, by working out you'll give it that and may push off the urge to masturbate.

How do I ask my girlfriend that I need some alone time? I don't want to hurt her feelings, but I feel like I need to breathe for a week or so

Hey, it can be hard sometimes to ask for space but it is very necessary to talk about boundaries. For example, you could always tell her that monday is video game night for you so your time to talk is limited because you want to enjoy playing games. It comes down to not directly saying you need space because that can be hurtful but instead to find things to diversify your time so you dont feel overwhelmed by one area.

When girls are on their rag is it possible for them to do things you'd never expect. Like maybe ignore you or be distant?

I would probably not refer to it as girls being "on the rag", that can be offensive because it dismisses a girls feelings when she is experiencing cramps, bloating and changes of her hormones at the time. Its possible it might make her feel like she wants distance from others because she may not feel fully equipped to be as interactive if shes not feeling 100%.

How do I ask my girlfriend to hang out during school without seeming clingy? Also how can you tell if a girl needs time alone? I haven't seen her for a week now sooo...

I would suggest asking her to meet you during lunch because you want to talk to her about something cool. Try to get into the habit of sharing things during the day like that. It wont come off as clingy if you just want to connect with her like that.

Why is worrying too much about your relationship bad? Also what's the most important key to a successful highschool relationship?

Worrying too much might lead to jealousy, anxiety and the fear that something may go wrong. its important to realize that a relationship is there to help you and the other person grow. I would say the key to a successful relationship is recognizing how you can help your partner grow and aiming to enhance each others lives.

Surprisingly my "rival" doesn't give a **** about my crush and she stopped giving signals to him suddenly. Did she give up? Or is fear freezing her up? Or could their relationship be entirely based by text?... I'm currently resisting the urge to talk with her about that issue...

I would say if you're going to talk to her, then dont even bother talking about him to her. Focus on her and her alone, take the time to connect with her and if you provide the value she needs she'll see that it makes sense to break up with him and see where things may go with you. And if that doesnt happen, you'll at least set the foundation for the future.

Ok I asked a girl to a dance she said yes and we went and had a good time, but we're still just friends...and it's been awhile and we still text a lot but she seems to be getting less interested and idk if I should straight up ask her out or what

hey, its good to keep up with hanging out after you do something like going to a dance and what not. If you feel like talking to her might be falling flat, try setting up plans to hang out again. She might be getting bored of just texting for now.

So I like this girl and I hardly ever see her exept in the hallways for a couple of seconds and my friend talked to her older sister and the older sister said she would never let her younger sister date me. Butthe older sister doesnt know me that well. Should I still try or move on?

I would say dont give up just yet. If the older sister doesnt know you that well, try to really think about what it is that may bother her about you. When you talk to the younger sister, try to be respectful and show her that you dont hold those negative qualities that the other sister might perceive you to have. All in all, showcase your best self and let them see you have the best intentions here.

Why does this girl text me everyday? We texted 2 weeks ago and our convos are whatever to me. Ive asked her for relationship help and she's helped me so I don't want to be rude, but we're running out of subjects and I don't know why she texts me if she knows I have a gf. Why does she text me?

She might text you because she likes you, or because she's in need of a friend. There's a lot of different reasons why she may be doing it, but you may need to let her know that you have a girlfriend and you don't want to give her the wrong impression of leading her on.

What's the point of having a highschool relationship? You don't have money, a car, or a job so what's the point?

I would say that in high school you have the opportunity to develop deep and personal connections with others without having to worry about jobs, money or cars. You're still young enough to just hang out to hang out and since you're both at the age of discovery and growth, you can really explore the idea of learning about a person.

Should I worry if my girlfriend hasn't texted me back? I texted her good morning and goodnight and still no response.

hmm try talking to her in person if shes not responding. theres a number of reasons why she may not have responded so its best to find out directly from her rather than jumping to conclusions.

Continuation of the last question: She has been my first girlfriend (for a year). What should I do? I even have a new crush, but I do not know if I would be cheating her, by trying to develop the relation, still missing the last girlfriend. Thanks for advice :)

Try to build things out with your new crush. Its ok to have feelings for multiple people, its a normal thing to experience. As you build things out with your crush then youll start to see that the previous girlfriend may enter your mind from time to time but ultimately what you have with the new girl will be worth more.

I have broken up with a girlfriend and she got a new boyfriend (it was easy for her because she the popular one). The only thing that stops me from moving on is the fear that I will regret letting her go and not fighting/waiting for her in the future. She was my first girlfriend (for a year).

Hey, i know how it feels to still have feelings for the girl that got away but its important to also recognize that people can come into and leace our lives all the same. We have to recognize when new people enter and be open to new possibilities or else we'll always feel like we're missing out on things of the past.

Everything I get to a point where my crush starts really opening up to me (about their problems or opinions) I always blow it and not keep up the conversation. Should I keep asking questions or give my opinions or talk about myself or?????

you should do all the things you said but you have to start building the romantic element of your interactions. That might mean teasing her, making fun of her for something silly or putting your arm around here. Theres a number of ways to flirt which are key from helping you not develop the type of connection that lands you in the friend zone.

Are relationships suppose to progress or can they stay at a certain dilemma? For example how do you know if you're relationship is moving forward?

Relationships generally progress over time if both partners are willing to talk about what they feel they are getting stuck on. Its when one person doesnt wish to engage, share their feelings or feel safe doing so that problems will occur. A good sign that the relationship is moving forward is that both people have a willingness to work put their differences.

What should I do with my sex urges if I am not able to have sex due to some age circumstances?

Feeling the urge to have sex doesnt always mean you have to have sex. Part of that sexual stress could be relieved through masturbation and part of it could be transferred into doing something physical like working out or playing sports.

I've seen your Youtube Channel for the first time today and I watched some of the videos aboout dating, talking to your crush etc. No offense, but why would we listen to your advices; are you a womanizer or are you experienced with these kind of situations? Just wondering.

I think a big part of what i talk about falls into the realm of sociology. I try to read a lot about human interaction, building connections and developing self worth. Tying that into asking your crush out is then easier if you look at it from the frame work of how people interact and how different gender roles interact.

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