@HollywoodDaddy

Hollywood Daddy

Ask me anything Follow
Ask @HollywoodDaddy

Sort by:

LatestTop

Previous

What does true friendship mean to you?

Friendship is a deep connection, where you feel comfortable being yourself and comfortable with the other person being themselves, and generally feeling like you're not an alien life form because that person exists.

Do you prefer Instagram or Facebook?

Facebook feels like a teacher's lounge, like a place for the 'adults' to go social while isolating. It's not something I'm too fond of.
Instagram feels a lot more like a locker room. There's a lot of posturing, but still glimpses of raw nudity. I like it. Especially when I find an instagram that causes me to connect to something or someone.
My boy Sam Pink has a great one. He's turned me on to a few artists on there, as well.

Related users

sam pink
Betzholio’s Profile Photo Cheyenne Betzhold

The best work of art in your opinion?

I don't think there's a best anything. The art I find remarkable is anything that incites feeling.

What is the most money you have ever held in your hand?

I'm not completely sure? Money hasn't been something I give overt power to. So, I don't remember it as if it's a remarkable event.
Guessing 10 to 20 grand.

What was the last message you received????

It was a picture of a beautiful lady friend, belly down on her bed, looking into the camera.

like the Linkin Park clip "One More Light"?

I just watched it and have mixed feelings.
There's a lot of connection in the video, which always makes me feel connected. That part I liked.
But the message at the end of the video seems disingenuous. It's in the same vein as when people post on social media talking to a dead relative. I get there's a need to express, but it comes off more about pandering to others than the actual person its supposed to be centered on.

What frustrates you the most?

Man...historically, I've been frustrated by a lot. I'm learning to navigate it better.
Externally, it's people not keeping their word/being inauthentic.
Internally, it's knowing how to resolve a problem but not acting upon it.

What would like to achieve in your life?

I don't think I want to achieve anything. To me an achievement is getting an external validation for a conditioned behavior. It reminds me of school.
My focus is on cleaning up my internal world to a point where I can feel free, in the moment, and connected. Providing space for others to do the same seems fulfilling.
The path to it doesn't matter so much. Life is constant change.

What mostly facetime apps u used on your phone ?

I don't. This may sound like a revelation to someone under the age of thirty, but, video chat kind of freaks me out.

What does Freedom mean to you?

I'm glad you asked. I was thinking of expounding on this, for my gofundme campaign. I realized when I wrote the original description, I was extremely emotional and anyone who didn't have intimate knowledge might not understand why freedom is so important to me.
To really understand freedom, imprisonment has to be known.
I always knew my childhood wasn't 'healthy'. It's obvious. But the extent of trauma endured is...I don't know if I'll ever fully realize it. Only later in my adult life, after socializing with people and witnessing their reactions/assessment, have I begun to grasp the weight.
The intense fear and shame inside of me is horrific. There's so many layers to it. Every time I think I've healed and resolved something, it opens another door to the same room.
And if you give energy to that circuitousness, then the fear deepens.
The other part of imprisonment is the body.
At age 18, I began to get intense, debilitating headaches. I would have panic attacks about cancer, several times a day.
Between the ages of 18-20, the back/top of my head would swell with golfball sized lumps, puss would eventually pour out of them.
Around age 22, my left cornea ulcerated for the first time. The pain was so intense, I came very close to stabbing my eye out. Then the right eye ulcerated.
Then both, back and forth, for years, until the surface of my corneas become completely scarred. Leaving me legally blind.
During that time, my inner ear canals would randomly swell up and bleed/pus. Leaving me hard of hearing in one ear.
No doctor could figure out what was wrong with me. I saw so many. There's a real hopelessness when you're in your twenties, visiting a doctor's office every two days, with the other patients 40+ years older than you, and no indication of what's wrong, or what can be done.
In my thirties, my spine has herniated in several places, without any accident to cause it.
One doctor, after seeing hundreds, finally diagnosed me with a rare autoimmune disease with only 150 cases reported worldwide.
Fear became terror. I felt like there was no point to anything, nothing could be enjoyed, just endure and die.
Drugs didn't remove the fear. Self-help didn't remove the fear. Resignation didn't remove the fear. Nothing has worked except for Tantra.
With Tantra, I've travelled to a space where light has poured out of me and my body here but not here, the fear completely gone, just pure energy--and it reminded me of how I imagine a toddler feels when they're laughing and running away from a parent with reckless abandon, completely unaware of anything but their experience of joy and excitement and freedom.
Developing that feeling, and fostering it in others, is what freedom means to me.

View more

Do you feel love tonight??

Love is always inside me/everyone. It's a situation of removing what's blocking access, then consciously going into that space when desired.
So, yes, always, if I want or remember to, tonight and any night.

if someone ur usually mean to told u they were in love with u which is why the bugged you, how would u feel and what would u say

I would question the behavior of 'meanness' towards the person, why is it habitual, what's motivating it from within, why is expression and boundaries avoided and hostility employed, why the person wants to 'love' someone who rejects them, how they define love.
In the best of efforts, I'd create a boundary from a secure, non-aggressive context, and hopefully help the person realize their own value.
Being human doesn't always allow perfect outcomes though. I think the basis would be setting an intention of caring for myself and the other person, then moving from there.

What is the main reason for you to refuse a date?

I've never been asked on a date. My personality is a strong authority figure, so, pretty much people are terrified of me. Has it's benefits and drawbacks.
I suppose if I were to refuse a date, it'd be based on an energetic reason.

In that case, what are some memorable movies from the 90s on that made you feel?

I've watched these movies repeatedly:
Blue Spring by Toshiaki Toyoda
Observe and Report by Jody Hill
Bubba Hotep by Don Coscarelli
Pulp Fiction by Quentin Tarantino
Otherwise, I've seen thousands of movies, and it'd take me some time to access the parts of my memory where they're all stored; but there's a lot of movies that have made me feel pre-2006.
1

Do u like anyone

I feel pretty depressed these days. I don't know.
There's a part of me that genuinely loves everyone, even the people who've betrayed my trust and shat on my smiling heart.
Then there's this other part of me, the part that only knows pain and doesn't trust anyone and sees no reason to like anyone.
Then there's this other part of me, the part that's beyond the mind and intuitively understands everything is created to be destroyed and there's a calming, but intense laughter.
1

What are some American movies from the last 10 or so years you really like?

I have a 10yr moratorium on American made films. Sort of coincidental to your question. I make rare exceptions though. I think the only ones that have made the exception list is 'the comedian' and this indie movie Tony Arnold directed with a budget of synthetic drugs and aerosol cans. Both made me feel, which is what I look for in a movie.
1

"I'm an intense person. I emote the same way. I've always felt a strong desire to hold everything in out of fear of detracting from other experiences." Do you have any advice for this? I feel the same way about myself, but haven't been able to change, or at least not as much as I would like to.

I recognized the underlying motivation was shame. Once I shifted to a place of worthiness for my being, the emotions found their voice. I still find myself, at times, reverting back to the old way of thinking; but I interrupt it. Awareness is paramount.
Your experience may be nothing like mine though.
What did tremendously help me was doing a series of transformational workshops. The emotional releasing exercises seemed to unblock me. I was finally able to stop caring so much about my childhood.
1

I'm really just confused about my inauthenticity. Trying to figure out what would help me. Any fakeness seems to be exhausting mentally. I just have a hard time upsetting others because I think there's a lot of overly sensitive people. Idk what I was asking. Just trying to understand why I act.

I've lived with intense shame about my emotions for all of my life. Only recently have I become aware of it. Before, it often manifested in a way where I was constantly over worrying/creating expectations similar to what you're saying now.
I'm an intense person. I emote the same way. I've always felt a strong desire to hold everything in out of fear of detracting from other experiences. I delved deeper and found the real culprit: shame.
Encourage you to ask yourself why are others more important than you?
1
Liked by: sam pink

It's not that I care if they like me it's that I care about people's feelings. For example I have a hard time telling someone something they created is bad in my opinion even when they ask.

Feedback isn't judgment. There's a huge difference. Which are you practicing.
Why is expressing yourself in a direct, authentic way not as worthwhile as someone's possible internalization of an external opinion? You're assuming the outcome before it happens and living in the psychological shadows as a result. Seems exhausting.

Next

Language: English

4.1

1,266,418 reviews
© Ask.fm 2024