@HollywoodDaddy

Hollywood Daddy

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a peach tumbling down an endless flight of stairs; the darkness growing with each bruising thud; the knock knock knock of the pit when the sweet flesh is gone.

A million years later, the nostalgia finally drives the stairs to madness, but without arms, suicide is just an unending dream.

have you found anything other than waste and annihilation outside the vital spot?

The soft stems of decapitated flowers and the orgasm breath of dead horses.

is tao lin a shitty person? is roggenbuck a shitty person? what kind of actions make a person shitty?

There are many shitty persons in this world. It isn't my duty to inform others of them; only myself.
Observations are mine. Vocalization is usually the result of external solicitation or reaching an internal boiling point.
People be people. Follow your own path, hunt your own food, declare your own enemies.

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Betzholio’s Profile Photo Cheyenne Betzhold

the way a compliment sits in the same place as a hewn branch to the face.

Compliments are the katana of the frail and wicked. I don't believe in them.

how do i feel my heart? these thick callouses cough flop and flake as it beats. need fracking technology to know warmth again.

Climb a mountain while high on peyote and find where the sun sleeps.

What I meant by the budget question, was what does your money go to? I used the quotation marks because I figured you wouldn't use that word yourself not because I thought the word was funny.

I mean, if you want to know how I spend my money, why wouldn't you ask 'how/what do you spend your money (on)?' Asking about a 'budget' is cutesy and insulting (to me), whether you want to own up to it or not.
It's just... i've endured through a lot of crazy shit to be alive and I try my best to be cool with everyone, but, like, when someone wastes my time with dumb nonsense or passive-aggressive behavior or disrespectful interactions, I'm not going to respond like most do. I completely understand that the average american has no concept of dignity, self-reliance, or, like, a code of conduct and desperately seeks any/all attention, but, i'm not that way and being someone's shit-slinging monkey distraction isn't my bag daddy-o.
If you want earnest, direct answers, ask earnest, direct questions.
I don't really pay attention to money. When I have it, I spend it. When I don't, I adapt and survive.
In general, I spend a large portion of my money on other people. I've always been that way.
The majority of my cash flow goes towards rent, women's vintage clothing, sunglasses, sex toys/implements and food. Not necessarily in that order.

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like do you see how Nietzsche utilizes italics? who does that anymore?

I've never read the original german text and have no clue if papa used italics or not.
Firmly believe he wouldn't have used twitter or ask.fm either.

there seem few opportunities to use italics anymore. i can't do it here, and i can't do it on on twitter and even with text messaging there are barriers. i pray for a comet from the bomb-filled sky.

Deep, man...

Seems to me people have the capacity to be both shitty and worthwhile... rape, murder, violence, theft are all shitty for sure - the rest is human emotion and forgivable. And criticism? It helps fiction to become deeper appreciated. It sharpens thinking. Plus it's interesting.

We weren't talking about capacity, but action and motivation.
What criticism ever helped a book become deeply appreciated? Like, if you have to look to another to explain the deeper meaning of something--which may or may not actually be there--then the meaning is less about the writing and more about someone's interpretation and retelling of it. A book is read to be enjoyed and felt; I believe. That's it. All this dick slapping about what this means or how blah blah advances language is for classroom jesters and mfa suckerfish.
Criticism is rarely interesting. It can be though. It's just the writers of it are usually more trite than the author of the writing being critiqued.
If you/others want to engage in it, cool. I don't have any qualms with that. My opinion isn't going to change though. I don't think it's a worthwhile endeavor.

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What does your "budget" look like?

I'm not on a business trip for a corporation and don't have a 'budget'. But, like, oh my god, it's such a funny word! hahahahahaha

it's more important to critique the person than the writing? i disagree. how do you know the person? and how do you critique a dead person? surely it's the words that matter, all the rest is fluff or crumbs.... that's one of the rare things you've said that i disagree with.

I just think that critiquing writing is something male frumps who've never experienced life engage in. Like, what's the point? To 'advance' language so a bunch of lame dicks at a university can flap their cunts and squawk? Or for a flock of spiritless humans to raise an eyebrow and guffaw from a safe digital distance?
It's pretty obvious when a person is a shitty or worthwhile human being. Action is authentic.

did you know you have ~ 55,000 thoughts a day. can you guess how many of those are relevant to anything that is actually happening?

Sure, I could.

That Mean Monday essay you wrote on Tao Lin was more a critique of him as a person. Do you have any opinions on his writings (besides liking Bed)?

I think it's more important to critique the person than the writing. I have respect for anyone who creates as long as it's earnest. Bullshit like 'crunk juice' that's obviously created as a form of marketing I will shit talk though.
Tao Lin is a talented writer. If someone doesn't recognize that fact, they're an egotistical moron. Do I like his writing? No. It doesn't resonate with me. But I respect it greatly.

how long did it take to write True Love? did you spend much time editing? what other prose of yours is out there?

I wrote the first 3rd during a deep pit of despair/hopelessness/depression in about an hour and posted it to my blog.
At the time, Michael Kimball was soliciting people to tell their life stories so he could transcribe them on a postcard, then use that to promote himself/create a book. Someone suggested I inquire about my life being transcribed. The response I gave was to laugh then say, 'why would a 'writer/poet' let some other writer put their life in words. I'll write my own.'
Which is what motivated me to start it.
Blake Butler read it on my blog, then asked if he could publish it in the now defunct lamination colony. I said yes, but wanted to add more to it so that it had a narrative arc. Begining and ending with birth.
The last 2/3 took like maybe a year? I don't remember. I was on a lot of opiates and depression then. It was really difficult to write the rest. I cried at times. A lot of stuff I hadn't thought about came back into my headspace. Missed the deadline like 3x and submitted it late.
There's some stuff out there. Not much though. I don't like the idea of publishing. I used to put stuff on my blog all the time but once it gained some popularity I stopped.

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"I have a pit bull." so you keep a retarded wolf as a prisoner to feel safe? damn, i thought i was bitchmade.

I wasn't talking about my dog.

do you listen to classical music? if so, what do you like?

I do but i'm not like super schooled in it. I know the big names. Was just listening to Brahms earlier. I like Thomas de Hartmann, in particularly with Gurdjeff's stuff.
I look to others who know the nuances of classical music to stear me towards what's good. Sometimes, just putting on the classical radio station is all I need.

Do you believe in love at first sight?

No, my definition of love only applies inward. I think a person's energy can be very enticing.

can i take a shit on your face? can i? answer me

What's it like being alive this many years and only masturbating, under your mom's roof?

if someone came to your door and you opened it a crack and realized it wasn't someone you wanted to see, and they forced their way in, would you shoot them (if you had a gun)?

I have a pit bull.

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