carniv♡re girl

i wrote hoya fic for his birthday because i have nothing else to give him except my adoration (and also the money i spent getting the mil album, which he probably appreciates more than this s o b)
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Man didn't become ashamed of his own nakedness, Hoya remembers learning, until he became aware of it. He feels much the same way when he wakes up: suddenly and very intensely aware of Sunggyu's bare skin against his own. "Hyung," he says softly -- it takes a few moments, but Sunggyu stirs, blinking his eyes once, twice, three times and yawning. Hoya smiles -- "Sleep well?" he asks.

---

Sunggyu mumbles something unintelligible, snuggling his face a little closer to Hoya's chest. "Very well, thanks," he replies. "I wanna sleep more, it's comfy."

---

"I wanna get up and take a shower," Hoya admits. Sunggyu laughs, and if they were face-to-face, Hoya would've mock-frowned. "You're not going to let me, are you?"

---

"Nope," Sunggyu says triumphantly, grinning slightly.

---

It's nice, Hoya thinks, waking up like this. He'd been scared it'd be awkward or weird, but it comes so easily instead. "I'll cut you a deal," he replies. "If you let me get up, I'll make breakfast."

---

"You drive a hard bargain, but I'll take it," Sunggyu says.

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a fic where junhyung accidentally bodyswaps with an alternate universe junhyung where he continued to have a career as poppin' dragon in xing (i can't make this kind of stuff up http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Xing_(band)#Former_Members just look at all these unfortunate stage names) and is having cross-band relations with hyunseung ;3
- - -

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"Ah, fuck -- Poppin' Dragon," Hyunseung moans.

---

Junhyung stops, slides his lips off of Hyunseung's cock, and looks up. "What the fuck," he asks, tone flat, "did you just say."

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Hyunseung dead-eyes him. "That's your name," he replies. "Can you continue sucking my dick?"

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"Are you kidding me? My name is Yong Junhyung, not..." (he tries not to shudder) "... /not/ Poppin' Dragon. I thought we had this conversation. We don't talk about that name. /Ever./"

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"I thought you liked it when I called you that, though," Hyunseung replies, so bluntly that Junhyung can't even believe that it's a lie or some kind of elaborate prank.

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For a few moments, they just stare at each other. "I'm going to go back to sucking your dick," Junhyung announces. "In return, just... don't call me that. Just. No."

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Hyunseung rolls his eyes. "Kindly stop talking and just blow me." Junhyung is happy to oblige.

---

- - -

---

Junhyung has one hand on Hyunseung's hips and three fingers up his ass and it feels pretty great. "Just fuck me," Hyunseung says, and it never fails to send a pleasant sensation down Junhyung's spine to see Hyunseung squirming on the bedsheets.

---

He takes his fingers out, but just a few seconds later they're replaced with his dick: he pushes in, slow and smooth, and Hyunseung moans. "You're so good," Junhyung says, thrusting once or twice shallowly before going deeper, harder --

---

"Poppin' Dragon," Hyunseung groans.

---

Junhyung's boner dies right then and there. "Holy shit," he says, in utter disbelief, hoping he can somehow attempt to will his hard-on back into life (just concentrate on Hyunseung's body, the sound of his voice, the way he mo -- /fuck/ he just said Poppin' Dragon again, nope, fuck, cannot do this) but gives up after a few moments, sliding out and slumping back onto the bed.

---

"What the fuck," Hyunseung says.

---

"That's what I want to know," Junhyung replies. "What the fuck."

---

And nobody came that night.

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The first time he debuts, it's with Xing and his name is Marumir. The second time, it's with U-KISS, and his name is Kibum. The third time, his name is Allen, and that's it -- just Allen. Every single time, though, Kevin is just Kevin, and he's always somewhere nearby, a strangely reassuring constant where everything else is subject to change. "Kibum hyung!" Kevin says, smiling widely, not even hesitating before reaching out to catch him in a hug. The rest of U-KISS stands behind him, looking vaguely confused about what to do.

---

"Hey," he replies, squeezing Kevin's shoulders for a second before letting go. It's not as if he's mad at U-KISS -- he can't be, even when he tried to be upset at them, because he knows they had nothing to do with how things had to fall apart -- but there's a certain awkwardness to the whole situation which only Kevin seems willfully oblivious to.

---

"Good luck, hyung," Dongho says (he looks exactly the same after all this time, Kibum thinks to himself), before flashing a quick smile and a thumbs-up.

---

Soohyun pretends to frown and elbows Dongho lightly. "Don't you mean break a leg?" he replies. "But anyway -- it's good to see you around again, you know? Really."

---

"It's good to be back," Kibum says, pausing for a moment before he smirks and adds, "I may have missed you guys. Maybe just a teeny, tiny bit."

---

"He's been replaced by an alien version of Kibum, one that feels sentimental emotions," Kiseop stage-whispers, before grinning widely. Kibum laughs, and the rest of them do too, and for a few moments it feels almost like a homecoming.

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i cheated a little because i actually wrote something like this for kfa mooooonths and months ago, so i found it and changed it (and theoretically, improved upon it!!) but, i'm always happy to write myungyeol, they're one of those pairings i just want to see together 5eva haha

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- - -

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Myungsoo is a better ghost than he ever was a friend, Sungyeol thinks, because he can't stop thinking about Myungsoo even though it’s been almost three weeks since they stopped talking. He tries to remind himself of all the things that he hated, like how Myungsoo could only see the world through his viewfinder or that his internal clock perpetually ran five minutes slow. He tries to think about how tired he was, of looking up and seeing a camera when he really wanted to see Myungsoo’s face, or of all the collected time he spent sitting alone in coffee shops staring out windows.

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(Instead, he thinks about the way Myungsoo would smile reach over to pull Sungyeol into a hug just to say hello, about the way that Myungsoo would rub his wrist affectionately whenever he sensed Sungyeol starting to get annoyed, about the way Myungsoo’s lips curl when he smiles -- )

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He's certain that Myungsoo would make up with him if he asked, and he hates himself a little for even considering it. Sungyeol has too much pride for that, and Myungsoo never could read between the lines.

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i'm gonna give 3 answers here, all of which are equally true. you can take whichever one you prefer.

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blunt answer: i will continue on living with a certain amount of apathy to the entire situation. some ppl on the internet don't like me. compared to the shit some of my friends have gotten over the past few weeks, this is relatively inconsequential.

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not as blunt answer: i empathize because i would have been pissed the fuck off had somebody said the exact same thing to me just a year ago.

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self-serving answer: i see nothing shameful i what i said. i can c/p the comment i made here if you want proof that my intent was not to hurt -- i would never, n e v e r intend to hurt somebody like that because i've been there and it fucking sucks. she can tell me she's pissed to my face if she wants and i would be more than willing to discuss it one-on-one. i own up to my shit if i've fucked up, but until i see the proof that i actually have fucked up, i will maintain my stance.

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For all Sunggyu attempts to exude arrogance and self-confidence, Myungsoo is all too aware that Sunggyu's just as insecure as he is, maybe even more. He's not perfect, no matter how much he tries to convince himself of it, so Myungsoo knows it's only a matter of time before Sunggyu makes a mistake on stage.

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It happens on their farewell stage, probably because Sunggyu gets complacent just a few minutes too early, thinking he's finally made it to the end and can successfully rub this in Myungsoo's face until their next round of promotions. It's just the tiniest of stumbles, but Myungsoo sees it and Sunggyu looks up and they meet gazes for just a second before they continue on with the choreography. Myungsoo attempts not to feel victorious, and calmly waits for them to pile backstage before he pulls Sunggyu away to the bathroom.

---

"So, what was that you were saying before? /If/ I catch you, right?" Myungsoo says. He grins, and Sunggyu gives him a look like he really wants to slap the smile off of Myungsoo's face.

---

"Get it over with," Sunggyu replies, and Myungsoo gladly obliges.

---

This time, it's Myungsoo in control: it's Myungsoo who bends Sunggyu over, making him clutch at the bathroom sink to keep balanced, it's Myungsoo who forces Sunggyu's legs together, it's Myungsoo who slides his dick between Sunggyu's thighs. "You're soft," Myungsoo says, leaning over to murmur it into Sunggyu's ears because he /knows/ Sunggyu won't like it -- being talked to as if they're an actual couple, whispering sweet nothings as if what they're doing is making love instead of fucking in a restroom.

---

But the thing is, Sunggyu /is/ soft. The space between his thighs is warm and tight and when Myungsoo moves, the feeling kind would almost remind him of fucking a girl, except the tip of his cock hits Sunggyu's balls with each thrust and the moans that Sunggyu's attempting to choke down are decidedly masculine. It feels great, he decides, even more so because he gets to bring Sunggyu down a peg or two like this. He buries his head into the back of Sunggyu's shoulder and groans as he orgasms, come dripping down the inside of Sunggyu's legs before reaching over and smearing it across Sunggyu's dick as he gives it a few, almost lazy jerks: Sunggyu comes a minute or so later.

---

"You should know that I'm not going to let things end like this," Sunggyu informs him as he wipes the come off of his thighs. Myungsoo just shrugs -- that's okay with him.

---

- - -

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this fic is OBER!!! weeps profoundly

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"Don't play dumb with me," Sunggyu replies, before pulling Myungsoo's boxers down and sliding his hand across Myungsoo's dick, slow and hard -- a little too hard, to be honest, but Myungsoo stays impassive.

---

"I really don't know what you're talking about, hyung," he says softly.

---

Sunggyu just shakes his head and smiles grimly. "We'll see about that."

---

Over half an hour later and Myungsoo hasn't come yet, because every time he starts getting close Sunggyu takes his hand off, or squeezes the base of his dick just hard enough to kill his orgasm, or finds some other way to leave him hanging. Myungsoo is caught somewhere between wrecked and incredibly pissed off. "Do you give in yet?" Sunggyu asks, after bringing Myungsoo to the edge for the fourth time -- it takes only a few minutes, and if Myungsoo weren't so frustrated he'd probably be embarrassed.

---

He doesn't trust himself to answer, so he presses his lips together and shakes his head. Sunggyu waits five minutes for his boner to die down, then pulls out a bottle of lube from god-knows-where (if Myungsoo had his head on right, he'd probably make a comment like "so that's what you and Woohyun hyung spend all your time doing in here, huh?") and coats his fingers with it, sliding one up Myungsoo's ass as he strokes at Myungsoo's dick with the other.

---

"Oh, fuck, I --" Myungsoo's eyelids flutter, and he groans when Sunggyu adds another finger, brushing up against something that sends a jolt through his body.

---

"Do you want to come?" Sunggyu asks. "Then you have to admit it, Myungsoo."

---

He only hesitates for a second before blurting it out: "Fuck, I -- I messed up! I messed up on stage and I thought you wouldn't notice," he says, and it takes all his self-respect not to whimper when Sunggyu takes his fingers out.

---

"I don't mess up," Sunggyu says, "because I'm not a failure, like you."

---

Myungsoo almost comes just from Sunggyu putting his dick in, and only lasts for about three thrusts until he actually does orgasm.

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- - -

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The thing is, Sunggyu's not hot to Myungsoo. Most of the time, Sunggyu's just his leader -- a good leader, he thinks, all things considered -- somebody he likes and respects, but that's about it. The vast majority of the time, Sunggyu doesn't even make the honorable mentions on his list of people he finds attractive, but then he gets truly fucking angry and suddenly he shoots straight to the top. Myungsoo tries not to think about the implications of that, if he can help it.

---

"If I ever catch you messing up on stage, I'm going to get even with you," Myungsoo says, after he's recovered enough to be able to speak without worrying about his voice shaking.

---

Sunggyu tilts his head. "/If/ you catch me," he replies.

---

- - -

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tbc (jfc)

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The first time, it happens because Myungsoo gets hard while Sunggyu's yelling at him. "Look, I don't care how fucking wasted you are, you don't say that kind of stuff, alright? You can call yourself a failure all you want, whatever, but you are crossing a fucking line when you bring me into it," Sunggyu snaps. His expression is deceivingly calm, but Myungsoo can tell Sunggyu's really pissed from the way his shoulders are hunched and the sharp, marked tone to his voice, and -- well, fuck, that sure is a hard-on in his pants.

---

Myungsoo shifts his weight, attempting to hide his boner, but he just ends up drawing Sunggyu's attention to it. Sunggyu narrows his eyes until they're barely visible, raising an eyebrow. "Myungsoo," he says, and his voice is annoyingly grating when he's trying to sound intimidating, but for some reason, Myungsoo's pretty sure his body's responding to it. "Myungsoo. Are you getting turned on by this?"

---

"Hyung," he replies. "To be honest, you're being really irritating right now, so I don't know why you'd think I'm turned on."

---

"Your dick says otherwise," Sunggyu says, and Myungsoo scowls because it's true.

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Ten minutes later and Sunggyu's mouth is on his cock and Myungsoo isn't entirely certain how they got here, but he's not complaining. It's different from what he's used to: everybody else who's ever given him a blowjob has always been careful, gently fastidious where Sunggyu isn't. Every once in a while, his teeth scrapes the underside of Myungsoo's dick (just hard enough for him to feel it, not hard enough for it to quite be painful) and he'd probably be a little scared at just how fucking hot he finds it to have his leader on his hands and knees if he could spare the brain cells to think about it. Sunggyu looks up and slides his lips off of Myungsoo -- it makes a noise that's obscenely loud, and Myungsoo's pretty sure he does it like that on purpose -- and says, "Do you understand what I'm saying, Kim Myungsoo? Don't mess with me, and don't fucking cross that line again."

---

"Hyung," Myungsoo replies, gritting his teeth as he speaks to make sure the words come out right, "I'm pretty sure you're just pissed 'cause I was right."

---

It is one of the most satisfying orgasms he's had in his life.

---

- - -

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The second time is because Sunggyu catches him messing up on stage. Myungsoo is almost sure that Sunggyu didn't notice, or maybe let it slide -- but then two weeks after the performance, when the rest of the group are off doing other things, Sunggyu pulls Myungsoo into his room. "I bet you thought I was going to let it go, didn't you?" Sunggyu says as he unbuttons Myungsoo's pants.

---

He doesn't want to admit that it's true. "I'm not entirely sure what you're talking about?" Myungsoo tries, because he knows Sunggyu hates it when they try to worm out of the mistakes they've made.

---

tbc.....

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Sunggyu rarely gives in, even when for things he doesn't care much about. Instead of one of his albums, though, Hoya puts in the CD of piano music from before. "I figured it out," Hoya says. "It's not that it's angry or that it's sad -- well, it could be both or it could be either, but that's not the important part. It's that it's... hopeful, I guess."

---

"I knew you'd know it, eventually," Sunggyu replies. "You usually do."

---

"Only when it comes to you," Hoya admits.

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When Sunggyu speaks, there's something in his tone that Hoya wants to say is tenderness: "You always have been the one who knows me best."

---

- - -

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They stop at a rest station and buy each other sugar-loaded Starbucks coffees. "We're only half an hour from home now," Hoya says.

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"And then we'll never be able to leave our houses for the rest of the summer," Sunggyu comments dryly. "Let's make these last few minutes count then, right?"

---

Hoya takes a sip of his coffee. "Let's talk now, then," he says carefully. Sunggyu doesn't reply but he nods, so Hoya goes on: "Let's not do this. Not now, at least. Because we're still young, you know, and I've got my dreams and you've got your dreams and -- "

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"Let's not distract each other from them?" Sunggyu fills in.

---

"No, it's not that," Hoya says. "It's that -- I've got you all figured out, or at least the most important parts. But I still don't know me. That's what I realized, going to New York with you -- I still don't know me."

---

"I think I get what you're trying to say," Sunggyu replies slowly. He reaches out and grabs Hoya's hand underneath the table. "Hey, Hoya?"

---

"Yeah?"

---

"Until we get back home, let's be in love," Sunggyu says. "And then after that, let's go back to being just Hoya and Sunggyu for a while. Until we've both figured out what we need to -- then we can pick up where we leave off."

---

Hoya smiles, and Sunggyu grins back. It's a yes.

---

- - -

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They pull into Hoya's driveway first, and Sunggyu leans over to kiss him. "Hey," Sunggyu says softly. "Thanks. For coming with me."

---

"After everything, and all you want to say is 'thanks,'" Hoya wants to say, but instead he just smiles. "What are you thanking me for?" he replies. "I didn't do anything I didn't want to do."

---

It could be weeks, months, years until they're ready for this again, but Hoya knows he can wait.

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Sunggyu has a hand on Hoya's hip and the other curled around the base of his dick lightly, his lips on the tip -- it's not that good but it's /Sunggyu/ and that thought alone is enough to make Hoya feel uncomfortably on edge. "Oh, fuck -- stop, stop," he mutters, pushing at Sunggyu's shoulders as he starts to feel an orgasm begin to build. "Seriously, Sunggyu, I'm telling you -- /please/ stop."

---

He does, and looks up. "Why?" he asks, voice soft.

---

If he comes here, like this, everything becomes different. Hoya doesn't know how to explain it, but he thinks that maybe he wants to pretend like it's not too late to turn around and act as if this never happened -- just like he wants to pretend like they can keep going like this whole trip never happened. "I just can't," Hoya answers.

---

"It's not as if I don't want to do this, you know," Sunggyu says. As expected, the word /love/ doesn't even enter the equation.

---

Hoya gently pushes Sunggyu's hand aside and pulls his pants back up. "I know," he replies. "It has nothing to do with you and everything to do with me, I think."

---

Sunggyu moves to sit next to him, hesitating for a moment before reaching for Hoya's hand and squeezing it. "Do you wanna talk?"

---

"Later," Hoya says, squeezing back. He leans over and rests his head against Sunggyu's shoulder, like he used to when they were younger and Sunggyu would tell him proudly, "I'm your hyung, so if you're sleepy, you should depend on me!" He's fallen asleep like this more times than he can count, but this time, he doesn't think he could if he tried.

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- - -

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If there were one word that Hoya would use to describe Sunggyu, it would be "determined", because Sunggyu has so much of it that he can drag Hoya halfway across the nation and back without even meaning to. If he had to pick one word to describe himself, it would also be "determined," because it's only through sheer force of will that he can keep going like this.

---

- - -

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They switch turns at the wheel. It takes three complete play-throughs of "In the Aeroplane Over the Sea" before Hoya breaks the ice. "Sunggyu," he says. "You need to change the CD, because this guy's weird hipster lyrics are starting to really get to me."

---

Hoya looks over and he catches Sunggyu's glance for a split second before both of them go back to staring at the road again. "They're deep," Sunggyu replies, but there's no insistence in his tone.

---

"Tell me that with a straight face," Hoya retorts. Sunggyu laughs hesitantly -- they meet gazes again -- and then both of them laugh together, more relieved than amused.

---

After the laughter dies down, Sunggyu sighs, and smiles slightly. "Okay, fine," he says. "You can change it."

---

TBC (and i thought i could finish it on this part weep)

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In the two and a half days they spend in the city, time passes by in jolts and jumps. In just a few blinks, hours pass as they pass from Manhattan into Queens; sometimes, Hoya turns and catches Sunggyu in the corner of his eyes and it feels so uncomfortably long. "I don't want to go back," Hoya says as they round the corner of Broadway Avenue.

---

"Me neither," Sunggyu replies, for reasons, Hoya knows, that are altogether different than his.

---

- - -

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They start the drive back late in the morning, with Hoya behind the wheel. "All this time, and I still can't start your car," he mutters as he fumbles with the ignition again -- to his own surprise, though, he manages it on his fourth try.

---

Sunggyu is uncharacteristically silent until they've passed over the bridge again. "When you're quiet, it's creepy," Hoya says, a weak attempt to break the atmosphere that's settled between them. Sunggyu, though, doesn't reply and instead puts on an unlabeled CD. Hoya expects it to be more Nell, and is surprised when instead it's piano music.

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"Chopin," Sunggyu explains listlessly. "His Revolutionary Etude."

---

Hoya gets the feeling there are all sorts of different meanings and layers and intentions behind those few words, but he never took piano lessons and he never was good with history. "Is it supposed to be sad or angry?" he asks.

---

No answer. He wasn't expecting one, anyway.

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- - -

---

Someday, Hoya will look back to this moment and he probably won't remember how he got there (part of him will wonder -- is it because he wanted to forget, or because it wasn't important?) but the only thing that really matters is that it happens: there's Sunggyu with his back pressed against the rear seat and Hoya on his hands and knees on top of him, leaning in dangerously close, closer, /closer/ --

---

He can't do this. He pulls back, suddenly and acutely conscious of himself down to each breath he takes. For a few seconds, he just stares, glassy-eyed and confused -- he wants to say something, 'I'm sorry,' maybe, but anything is better than nothing -- not moving closer, not pulling further away. But then, Sunggyu reaches up and grabs him by the collar of his shirt and pulls him down; their teeth clack against each other as their lips meet and Hoya stops thinking until Sunggyu's mouth isn't on his anymore.

---

"If you're gonna do something like this," Sunggyu mutters, not quite meeting his eyes, "at least do it all the way through."

---

Hoya touches his lips. "Ah," he says. Everything is changing too fast for him.

---

- - -

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tbc! when will it end? (it is a mystery)

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The first chip in the illusion of perfection comes in the form of some jackass who smirks and makes a comment about chinks that's so loud it must be deliberate as they pass each other in the street. They're not unused to this kind of thing, and Hoya's watched Sunggyu blow up time and time again. This time, though, he's caught off-guard, as if he didn't expect that this could happen in a place he had so many hopes about, and Hoya reaches out to catch Sunggyu's wrist before Sunggyu can turn around and scream.

---

"Don't," Hoya says, looking Sunggyu in the eye. He needs a haircut, Hoya notices, and he's starting to grow out the deep burgundy color he'd died it a month or two back.

---

"Hoya," Sunggyu snarls. "Let me go."

---

Hoya's almost tempted to let go, but he knows he can't. "Hyung," Hoya says, because he knows it's one of Sunggyu's weakness -- an inability to resist responsibility when its foisted on his shoulders, whether it's leading the school choir or getting straight A's or pulling age rank. "Just let it go."

---

There's a moment when it looks like Sunggyu doesn't know what emotion he's supposed to be feeling -- he clenches a fist and then relaxes it, breathing deeply. "Yeah, I know," he replies, even though he sounds like he wants to.

---

"Then let's go," Hoya replies. Still holding onto Sunggyu's wrist, he tugs Sunggyu in the opposite direction. (He doesn't miss it when Sunggyu looks back, but stays silent.)

---

- - -

---

Sunggyu's the one in love with New York City, but Hoya's the one who memorizes the subway lines in a snap, who figures out where buses stop and which borough is where and how to get to each location with the least amount of hassle possible. It'd be useful, except they have nowhere in particular to go.

---

- - -

---

They spend the night in a dirty hotel on the outskirts of the city. There's only one bed and the air conditioning doesn't really work, but neither of them are willing to spend more money on something better. "This place is a hovel," Hoya says offhandedly. "But at least it's not your shit car."

---

"Whose shit car got us all the way over here?" Sunggyu replies, throwing his backpack on the bed. "Dibs on the shower."

---

After they've both gotten clean and changed into sleeping clothes, they claim opposite sides of the bed and lie down on top of the covers -- it's too hot for blankets, the air is too sticky and moist -- and turn on the television. They don't talk, but the atmosphere's comfortable, and the last thing Hoya remembers before falling asleep is Sunggyu flipping through the channels.

---

- - -

---

tbc (when will this end NOBODY KNOWS)

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They both wake up just past nine in the morning, still exhausted. "Caffeine, I need caffeine," Sunggyu says, rubbing his eyes blearily. Somehow, they manage to pull each other into the closest gas station -- after downing about three large coffees each, the sun starts to become less painful.

---

Hoya takes the wheel and immediately regrets it, because Sunggyu makes handling the ignition so much easier than it actually is. "What the fuck is its problem," he mutters as he turns the key again. "Is there some sort of ritual I need to perform? A sacrifice to put on the dashboard so the car will accept me as a driver?"

---

"Since you bought all those snacks, I guess I can show you a thing or two," Sunggyu says loftily, reaching over and pushing Hoya's hand aside. He gets it in one go.

---

"I'm not saying thank you," Hoya says. Sunggyu laughs.

---

- - -

---

if i wrote more seriously this is where i would write some stuff subtly hating on how many cornfields are in ohio, because lovingly hating on ohio as an ohioan is one of my favorite hobbies. please pretend that there are some nice descriptions of some lovely, scenic highway roads in pennsylvania here. (they really are nice!!)
i'm sorry for this paragraph ヽ(；▽；)ノ

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- - -

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Hour three into Sunggyu's impromptu performance of Nell's entire discography (along with some songs thrown in "just because I like them," Sunggyu says), they finally come within view of George Washington Bridge, and Sunggyu falls silent. Hoya opens his mouth to make fun of him, but then he looks over, and Sunggyu's expression washes away any words that might've come to mind.

---

"New York City," Sunggyu finally murmurs, just after they've paid at the toll booth. "We've made it."

---

And really, that's all there is to say about it.

---

- - -

---

Hoya knows Sunggyu well enough to know this: the first time Sunggyu falls in love, it's on a hot summer day in one of New York City's subway stations, and it's not with a person. On this side of the platform, there's a guy with a saxophone and a young woman singing -- the smooth, brassy tones of his instrument and the clear, high notes she sings blend together with the sounds around them. On the other side, another lady, this one with a guitar and harmonica. "Listen to that, Hoya," Sunggyu says. "They're so /alive/."

---

A few yards away, the woman sings: "Who do I sing for?," she says, voice somehow -- miraculously -- rising above the dozens of people speaking, the subway trains rumbling in a distance. "I said it's not you, it's not you, it's not you." (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OXGyQk3kO4M)

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"We're alive too," Hoya replies, but he gets the feeling Sunggyu's not listening.

---

- - -

---

tbc

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They've just stopped at a rest station when their parents call. "You two need to come home right now," Sunggyu's father says over speakerphone, and Hoya's mother makes a more emotional plea to the same message. Hoya turns to Sunggyu rather helplessly, shaking his head a few times -- /we really should go back/ -- but Sunggyu won't meet his gaze.

---

"We're not coming back until we're ready to," he says, with a sort of stony calmness, before hitting 'end call'.

---

Hoya feels like shit, to be honest, because it's the first time he's ever heard his parents so pissed at him. "Maybe we should go back, Sunggyu," he says.

---

"After we make it to New York City," Sunggyu replies.

---

- - -

---

Sleeping in a car, they discover, is kind of fucking terrible. "I am so uncomfortable right now," Hoya says.

---

Sunggyu reaches over and pats his thigh lightly. "Just go to sleep, then it'll stop feeling uncomfortable," he replies.

---

"You are the worst," Hoya mutters. "How are you /not/ uncomfortable?"

---

No response. Hoya looks over -- Sunggyu's either asleep, or pretending to be asleep.

---

- - -

---

OK i'll write more of this tomorrow, i'm tired now ;~~;

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it's a roadtrip across the u.s. because i have a lot more experience riding a car across the states than, well, anywhere :') kindly assume that infinite members are korean-americans
- - -

---

Hoya wants to go west to California, but Sunggyu wants to go to New York: they both know who'll get their way, but Hoya puts up an attempt just to have tried. "Fine, we'll go to New York, then," he says, giving in after twenty minutes of back-and-forth arguing.

---

To his credit, Sunggyu feels a little bad. "Next time we can go where you wanna go," he replies. "But, thank you."

---

"It's not as if I don't want to go to New York," Hoya says. "But California. Hollywood. /Usher/."

---

"I should've known," Sunggyu mutters.

---

- - -

---

They grew up in a Midwestern college town, not so small that everybody knows everybody else, but small enough that most of the Koreans in the area do. It's not a bad place -- neither of them dislike it -- but it's stifling in the way home can be. "Let's go on a road trip," Hoya suggests one afternoon, not entirely serious, but Sunggyu looks up as if his mind's already decided.

---

"Yeah, I want to," Sunggyu says. "Isn't that the kinda thing teenagers should do, anyway?"

---

"Rebellious ones, maybe," Hoya replies, shrugging because both of them are straight-A students that've never strayed in their lives.

---

Sunggyu smiles (secretly, that's all it takes for Hoya to give in) and says, "It's never too late to turn over a new leaf. Let's go."

---

"Our parents would never let us," Hoya points out.

---

"You can drive, I can drive," Sunggyu retorts, "I own a car which I bought /with my own money/, and I've got money in the bank that I've been saving for nothing in particular. We're both over eighteen. We leave a note and leave tomorrow morning and tell them we'll be back in a week or two."

---

Hoya's throat is dry. "Okay," he says. "Yeah -- let's go."

---

- - -

---

Sunggyu's car is pretty nice for something a teenager bought on his own -- sometimes it has a little trouble starting up, but once it gets going, it's pretty much smooth sailing. "It's just you, me, the radio, and a ton of snacks in the backseat," Sunggyu says cheerfully as they get on the highway. "Exciting times, right?"

---

"You sound way happier being with the snacks than being with me," Hoya jokes.

---

Sunggyu laughs. "You should know by now how I feel about snacks," he replies. "My one true love. The only ones who understand me."

---

"Say that again in two days after you've eaten them all," Hoya says. He turns the radio on, and they sing along loudly to America's Top 40 Hits.

---

- - -

---

TBC

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never too much hogyu, you know it's my favorite (ღ˘⌣˘ღ) (also sorry for how long this took ;u;)
- - -

---

"It's that guy again," Sungjong says, yelling over the speakers as he points his thumb behind his shoulder. "You know. The uncoordinated one."

---

"Why are you telling me this?" Hoya asks, pretending as if he isn't totally craning his neck to try and get a better view.

---

"Oh, I don't know, hyung. Maybe because of your big gay crush on him?" Sungjong replies, rolling his eyes.

---

Hoya kind of wishes he could deny it. "He just stands out, okay," Hoya says.

---

Sungjong gives the uncoordinated guy a quick once-over. "Whatever you're seeing, I'm not, but to each their own," he says evenly. "By the way, I sent him a cocktail and told the bartender to tell him it's from you. You can thank me later, hyung."

---

"You did not," Hoya replies, not sure if he's horrified or thrilled. He turns to look at the uncoordinated guy, hoping desperately that the drink that the bartender is handing him isn't the one that Sungjong sent -- but then the DJ starts playing an embarrassingly cheesy 80s-style song that sounds like it would be a favorite for handmade porn videos literally the exact moment that the uncoordinated guy looks up and makes eye contact with him.

---

His fight-or-flight instinct starts screaming at him /get out now!/ and his body attempts to jerk into action, but Sungjong catches his wrist before he can make an escape. "You are so unsmooth, hyung," Sungjong says. "You and the uncoordinated one will be a good pair, I bet he's awkward too."

---

"Let me go," Hoya insists, trying to keep a note of desperation out of his voice. "/Please/ let me go?"

---

"If you get laid tonight, you had better buy me that blazer I've had my eye on," Sungjong replies cheerfully, letting go and darting off just as the uncoordinated one approaches.

---

"Hey," the uncoordinated one says. "Thanks for the drink."

---

"Uh, no problem," Hoya replies, hoping he sounds more confident than he feels. "My name's Hoya, by the way."

---

"My name's Sunggyu," he says. There's a pause, and then he smiles. "Do you wanna dance, Hoya?"

---

The only thing Hoya really knows about Sunggyu is that his face is cute, Hoya really like to touch those thighs, and that he has a pitiful lack of rhythm, always moving on the off-beat when he should on the down-beat. There is pretty much no way, Hoya reflects to himself, that this isn't going to end up with an embarrassing boner. "Okay," he answers.

---

- - -

---

Hoya texts Sungjong the next morning: "so how much does that blazer cost?"

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