@MissParkerMarie

Parker Marie

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First i want to say that you are so pretty. Second, how do you feel about gender fluid people? Some days i feel male, some female, most both.

Hey, thanks! Genderfluid and non-binary genders are absolutely legitimate. While I'm binary-identified, I can't fully relate, but I can say that it's awesome that you seem to have come to terms with your own identity! Be you! Call yourself whatever you want! There are no absolutes, and there are no rules!
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Liked by: RidgeBack Rogue Alicia Artemissian

"Transwoman" and "transman" instead of "trans woman" and "trans man" both really rub me the wrong way. Leaving the space out seems to bother me more than the "T word". Do I need to lighten up?

Most of the time people use this, I feel like they genuinely don't understand that there's anything wrong with it. I always include the space, and I try to advise people to do the same, but... Yeah... It's Meh.
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Liked by: Alicia Artemissian

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Have you had the surgery? Do you plan to?

Oh wow... Hrmmm... Well, I did promise to answer all trans related questions... *sigh* okay...
I assume you're referencing sexual reassignment surgery...
So, first off, this is a question you really shouldn't ask a trans person. Think of it this way: How often have you asked cisgender people about their genitals? Exactly...
That said, no, I have not at this point... Will I? I honestly don't know. It's expensive, and it's a major surgery, so it's something that really should be given a lot of thought.
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Liked by: wren gayle romano Dean Alexander Alicia Artemissian E.Winter Grey

I've noticed that a lot of my trans friends seem to be falling in love with each other. Do they click because they just understand each other better than cis/trans relationships or is the reason a bit sadder...rejection from outside the trans community?

Honestly, I'm not sure. For some, maybe the former. For others, the latter. I'd imagine that for many it's a mix of the two. Having common interests and life experiences is awesome and helpful for any relationship. I'm sure having something like a shared trans history provides some interesting conversation. Hey, love is love.
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Liked by: Alicia Artemissian

What do you recommend transwomen do about locker rooms and showers? Assume that not using them isn't a viable option.

Personally, I just try to avoid these situations... Sadly, it's just something that's scared me into avoiding gyms... I'm afraid I'll get yelled at, assaulted, or just otherwise embarrassed.
In general, though, the trans women I know that do use locker rooms and showers try to change in the most private areas in the locker rooms (privacy stall if available) and seek out stalled showers. Believe me, generally, the last thing a trans person wants is for a crowd of strangers to see their genitals.
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Liked by: Alicia Artemissian

What tips do you have on explaining how trans misogyny operates differently from other forms of misogyny?Thanks & rock on!

Julie Tilsen
Hrmmm... Basically, take standard misogyny and add a layer of ignorance, irrational hate, and a handful of double standards. A proper analogy isn't coming to mind, but maybe someone reading this from Twitter has something useful to add?
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Liked by: Soledad Medrano Alicia Artemissian Lily Fox

Can a trans lesbian find love? I've tried online dating and the like, and it seems like even fellow trans women aren't interested in responding.

People come in all shapes, sizes and body configurations. I feel like being trans certainly makes finding a match more difficult, but at the same time, it's not like you'd want to be with someone who wasn't into you for you, anyway, right?
Keep your head up, try to have patience, just believe things will work out.
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Liked by: Adina Kat Lily Fox

Who do you see as role-models?

Oh, wow... Hrmmm... Well, I have some great friends that have inspired me. For one, Laura Jane Grace is such a wonderful human being and true inspiration to just go out there and be myself. Kat Hache and Zinnia Jones/Lauren M. have both been instrumental in my growth as a writer. Cristan Williams is one of the most talented journalists I've ever read, and covers trans issues with an unbelievable level of detail. Those are just a few off the top of my head.
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Liked by: Alicia Artemissian

Gender and sexual orientation are separate etc but I can't help but feel there's some overlap there. I'm quite good at pretending to be a cis/het guy, except in bed. Penetrative sex does nothing for me unless I'm the one being penetrated. What do you think?

Hrmmm... I honestly don't know. On one hand, there's no rule that straight, cisgender men absolutely NEED to be all about penetrating someone. Not being into that doesn't make someone trans by default. On the other hand, if someone is trans, body Dysphoria certainly can dissuade someone from enjoying certain activities (sex among them)
There are no rules. Be you!

When/how did you realize you were trans?

It's just something that's always kind of been with me. I used to think that everyone must want to be the opposite sex from time to time, and EVERYONE had probably spent their childhood praying that they'd wake up as someone else... I didn't know there was such a concept as trans people until I was 12 or 13? Even with that knowledge, I tried to repress things.
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Liked by: Alicia Artemissian

Have you seen any data for what a "normal" level of estradiol/estrogen is? I'm trying to put my lab results in context as far as how well I'm doing on absorption. (not looking for medical advice, just any data you may have stumbled across)

Hrmmm... Not off hand. If I recall correctly, there's a chart (I have absolutely no idea whether the data is accurate or where it came from) on the "hormone replacement therapy (transgender)" Wikipedia page.

How does it feel to be a traditionally beautiful woman? Does it feel strange to suddenly get cishet male attention?

Oh! Thank you! I still have a hard time accepting that some might view me as attractive, but again, thanks!
As for getting attention from straight, cisgender men, I actually find it kind of weird. Often, though, the attention I get comes in the form of street harassment, so that's not fun...
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Liked by: Alicia Artemissian

What does cisgender mean?

Simply put: it's the opposite of transgender. "Cis" means "on the side of" as opposed to "trans," which means "across."
Why is it necessary? "Why not just say 'normal' or 'straight?'" Well, for one, if you say people who aren't trans are the normal ones, it creates a sense that trans people are freaks. It's othering. As to why saying "straight" doesn't quite cover it, fact is, there are a lot of straight trans people (trans women attracted to men, trans men attracted to women), so it's vague.
Example: "My siblings are both cisgender, but my friend X is transgender."
This isn't to say you need to refer to cis folks as specifically cis every time you're talking about them, but only in the context of clarifying whether or not they're comfortable with the gender they were assigned at birth.
"My sister and I are both women."
See? I referred to the two of us without that qualifier. Now, if you were to ask if we were trans, I could say, "I am a transgender woman, and she is a cisgender woman."

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Liked by: Soledad Medrano Alicia Artemissian Angel

Will estrogen hormones stop a trans woman's penis from being able to erect?

"Your mileage may vary." Some trans women are able to achieve erections similar to their pre-hormone days, some can't, and others kind of end up in an in between kind of area (semi-hard). This is generally due to the reduced testosterone rather than the increased estrogen.
One way a few trans women I know have described it as "it still works, just differently."
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Liked by: Kat Alicia Artemissian

Thanks for doing this! My question is, are transwomen offended if they're described as being "born male", and is it any better to say "biologically male"? Because I know news stories about trans people use those terms often. P.S: You look like Taryn Manning.

Hi! No problem! Happy to do this. I'm really not a fan of saying "born male" or "biologically male." As an increasing amount of data comes in from the scientific community on the root of what makes people trans (still very much a grey area), we see that there tends to be a very biological/genetic component to someone being trans. I tend to simply use the phrase "assigned male at birth" and "assigned female at birth," though there's no specific guideline set up from a style guide point of view.
Also, feel free to ask someone how they'd like to be referred to. They'll probably appreciate the consideration on your part.
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Liked by: Alicia Artemissian Lily Fox

How can straights be good allies?

The best way a cisgender person can be an ally is to listen to trans voices, ask how you can help (help may vary from person to person, issue to issue). Also, feel free to speak up if you hear about someone being transphobic or promoting an agenda harmful to trans people (see: the attempt to repeal CA's new trans student law).
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Liked by: Dean Alexander Alicia Artemissian Lily Fox

What do you think of John Irving's depiction of transgender characters in his fiction?

I'm actually not familiar. Sorry!

Why do you think most trans women tend to be lesbians?

Are they? Seems there's a pretty significant amount of diversity in sexual orientation among trans people.

Why do you go by 3 names in your writing?

Well, I figured that since I picked out my first and middle names, I might as well use them?
Though, really, since I picked a very gender-neutral first name, I throw the middle name (I chose it after my mom's middle name) in there to give it some clarity.
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Liked by: Blake Croissant

What are your goals in life?

Oh, geez. Life? Um... To love and be loved in return?
Shorter term? It'd be cool to get a permanent writing/reporting gig somewhere. Freelancing is fun and all, but a.) it'd be nice to have a "home" and b.) it'd REALLY be nice to not have to work another job in order to pay my bills.
Also, it'd be neat if I had a chance to do some more TV work. It was fun being on Al Jazeera last month.
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