Kamga. ...do u eva feel inadequate... Like maybe your not gud enough? If no, Did you ever ? How'd u mk it stop?
I don't even think I deserve to answer this question. I don't think I have the answer you need or if it's going to help.
That's how inadequate I feel. That's the same way I feel when someone pays me a compliment. Or when someone says they enjoyed a story I wrote. Or that my pictures are nice.
Till date, I don't think I am good enough for anything. In fact, I never thought I was good enough to date anyone until very recently.
I had my first "relationship" when I came to the University. I spent all my secondary school years vacillating between the fear of rejection and this feeling of inadequacy.
Before I wrote every exam, I always felt like I hadn't prepared enough. Before I spoke in class, I always thought to myself that I was going to say nonsense and that the whole class was going to laugh at me. And that finally, after all my geek look, nerd shenanigans and smartass antics, they'll finally call me out for the scam I was- a fake dumb dude who didn't believe in what he said half of the time.
You'll never know this. Because I look so "serious" most of the time. And my thick rimmed glasses give off this dude-knows-his-stuff-vibe.
Spoiler alert: I don't. And for a long time, I've wanted to. But here's a simple observation that reels in some sense to me: "I know one thing, that I know nothing"
Remember who said that? I do. But I won't tell you. :) Do a Google search. I think you'll find some more interesting stuff.
Fun fact, I didn't know who said that until I did a Google search myself.
What's my point? It is the answer to your last question ( How you'd make it stop)
It's also a compass to help navigate this state of inadequacy- you'll never know everything. You'll never have every answer. There are times when you'll be scared about everything and nothing. There are times when you'll be worried whether anything you're doing is going to work out. There are times when you will feel like breaking down and crying.
You know what...replace "you", with "I" above, and that's me. That's exactly how I feel most of the time.
However, the thing that keeps me going, the thing that gets me back in check is knowing that it's okay to feel inadequate.
It's okay to not know everything. It's okay to not have all the answers. It's okay to have nothing to say.
After reading Steve Pressfield "The War of Art" and "Do the Work", I've come to be able to recognize "resistance" in my life- procrastination, laziness, wanting to get more knowledge rather than taking action, etc.
This feeling is Resistance. And you must acknowledge it. Respect it. It is real. But if you let it win, you will never be the authentic version of yourself.
In fact, the stronger the feeling of inadequacy, especially whenI have prepared well for the task at hand, the more I feel this is something I MUST do.
Use this feeling. Tap into it. Fight. Even when you lose, don't give up. You're alive. Have faith.
It's what has helped me. I hope it helps you.
That's how inadequate I feel. That's the same way I feel when someone pays me a compliment. Or when someone says they enjoyed a story I wrote. Or that my pictures are nice.
Till date, I don't think I am good enough for anything. In fact, I never thought I was good enough to date anyone until very recently.
I had my first "relationship" when I came to the University. I spent all my secondary school years vacillating between the fear of rejection and this feeling of inadequacy.
Before I wrote every exam, I always felt like I hadn't prepared enough. Before I spoke in class, I always thought to myself that I was going to say nonsense and that the whole class was going to laugh at me. And that finally, after all my geek look, nerd shenanigans and smartass antics, they'll finally call me out for the scam I was- a fake dumb dude who didn't believe in what he said half of the time.
You'll never know this. Because I look so "serious" most of the time. And my thick rimmed glasses give off this dude-knows-his-stuff-vibe.
Spoiler alert: I don't. And for a long time, I've wanted to. But here's a simple observation that reels in some sense to me: "I know one thing, that I know nothing"
Remember who said that? I do. But I won't tell you. :) Do a Google search. I think you'll find some more interesting stuff.
Fun fact, I didn't know who said that until I did a Google search myself.
What's my point? It is the answer to your last question ( How you'd make it stop)
It's also a compass to help navigate this state of inadequacy- you'll never know everything. You'll never have every answer. There are times when you'll be scared about everything and nothing. There are times when you'll be worried whether anything you're doing is going to work out. There are times when you will feel like breaking down and crying.
You know what...replace "you", with "I" above, and that's me. That's exactly how I feel most of the time.
However, the thing that keeps me going, the thing that gets me back in check is knowing that it's okay to feel inadequate.
It's okay to not know everything. It's okay to not have all the answers. It's okay to have nothing to say.
After reading Steve Pressfield "The War of Art" and "Do the Work", I've come to be able to recognize "resistance" in my life- procrastination, laziness, wanting to get more knowledge rather than taking action, etc.
This feeling is Resistance. And you must acknowledge it. Respect it. It is real. But if you let it win, you will never be the authentic version of yourself.
In fact, the stronger the feeling of inadequacy, especially whenI have prepared well for the task at hand, the more I feel this is something I MUST do.
Use this feeling. Tap into it. Fight. Even when you lose, don't give up. You're alive. Have faith.
It's what has helped me. I hope it helps you.